There’s Something about Your Appetite
Darling, I have an interesting question to ask you:
What did you learn about your appetite, i.e. your desire for food, when you were little?
Did your parents or siblings tease you about it being too big? Too hearty? Just plain out of control?
In their childhood, many women (myself included) were taught that their desire for food, their appetite, was somehow out of balance, inconvenient and much too large. Many women have also learned that their desire for food is something to be feared, because it’ll lead them into serious trouble – the weight-gaining kind of trouble!
This message is a lousy one – it promotes a completely disempowering attitude about something as natural, wholesome and important as your appetite.
The Truth about Your Appetite
The truth about your appetite is pretty fantastic news:
Your appetite is your body’s natural, healthy and wise expression of desire for food.
Desiring food is a wonderful part of your female body, and seeking food is part of your body’s pleasure-seeking design.
While I wish this simple bit of “programming” would have been installed in your mind by this culture, your parents and peers, I know it probably hasn’t!
Starting today, I’d love for you to start unlearning the negative messages related to desiring food and your appetite, and start learning to trust your appetite. Allow me to show you the way.
How to Trust Your Appetite: A 3-Step Guide
Step 1: Slow down.
Eating, chewing and tasting brings your body big pleasure. This is why slowing down to enjoy these little nuances is so important!
Slowing down while you eat helps you consciously realize that your appetite is not nudging you towards eating like a garbage disposal, but towards obtaining a healthy feeling of satisfaction and nourishment.
Unless you slow down when you eat, your body won’t get any sensory input–i.e. the delightful taste, sight, smell of your food–-and your body will say: “Huh? I didn’t really see, smell or taste anything, babe. Nothing happened here–-I’m still hungry, more food please!”
Case in point: Have you ever munched on cookies while typing, and reached for the next one, only to find them all gone without you even being aware that you’d scoffed the lot? Nods. Hence the importance of sensory input!
Slow down and give your body the *pleasure* and sensory opportunity to realize, “Hey girl, this is tasty, this is nourishing, this… is filling.” This will help you trust your appetite – you’ll realize it’s your healthy, satisfaction-seeking friend, not your fat-seeking foe.
Step 2: Investigate your food desires.
Take the time to really explore and investigate your appetite, your food desires.
When you do, you’re going to find something surprising:
What you truly desire is high-quality, healthy food, because your body wants to feel alive, nourished and energized, not spaced out, bloated and fatigued by low-quality, low-nutrient, refined foods!
To investigate and deeply connect with your appetite, you can ask yourself:
- How does my body feel about this food? (Connect with your body’s messages.)
- What does my thinking and knowing say about it? (Consider the nutritional value.)
- How much of this food will feel pleasurable to eat in this particular moment?
You can combine investigating your appetite with slowing down–-bring every ounce of your awareness to sit with all of your senses at the table. Investigating your food desires will help you be at peace with your appetite, and trust its wisdom.
Step 3: Make the decision to appreciate your choices.
I already appreciate your appetite, because I know that your wise, divinely-designed female body is perfectly built to seek goodness, health, satisfaction and pleasure. Question is: do you appreciate your wisdom yet?
If you don’t, relax: you can borrow my appreciation, and trust, until you build your own!
Learning to trust your decisions regarding food, without second-guessing or criticizing yourself for them, is a huge step – one that requires time, patience, practice and support.
Once you slow down and take the time to investigate your desire for food, it will get a lot easier to believe in your choices. I wholeheartedly believe that you actually do know what’s good for you, what your body needs to eat to be healthy and how to choose foods that are safe, right-for-you and healthful.
I’m ready and willing to shout it from the rooftops if I have to: Women of the world, you can trust your desire for food! Just slow down, investigate your appetites and consciously appreciate your choices. These 3 steps will put you on the right track for creating an environment that promotes your slimming, your self-knowledge and hey, your pleasure.
I wonder:
- What did you learn about your appetite when you were younger?
- Which step above can you commit to implementing? Which one sounds the toughest right now?
Before you run off and celebrate this empowering new knowledge about your appetite, make sure you forward this post to that friend of yours who says she feels she’s “always hungry!”
With big enthusiasm and appetite,
xo Jena
P.S. I have an appetite for your presence at Pleasure Camp NYC!
This 3-day, weekend event is the cream of the crop experience for slimming down without a struggle. It’ll give you a fun-filled kick in the pants for creating a life that melts the pounds off your body, in a way that is healthy, feminine and permanent.
As an added bonus, I’m offering a bring-a-friend-for-$50 special, so you can easily invite one of the dearest women in your life to join you in the Pleasure Camp experience on November 30 – December 2.
If you haven’t yet, hurry and click over to find out what the details, reviews and activities are all about.
New York, New York
Danielle @ Clean food creative fitness and realizing your dreams
What a great post. I think when I was younger I learned that my appetite was too big so I was always trying to ignore or control it! I think it will be hardest for me to appreciate my food desires because I tend to be one to pick myself apart for them.
Jena
Appreciate them, let them soak in and lead you to a pleasurable nourishing meal that you can enjoy to the fullest!
Erika
Thanks Jena! I think one of my favorite lines is when you said, If you don’t, relax: you can borrow my appreciation, and trust, until you build your own! I have also had to look at food and emotion from a long term point of view rather then a quick fix or instant need..such as-I think I want this now, but I know it’s going to make me feel bloated, puffy etc….feeling better in the long run helps me make choices that are based on craving..then with that self- love I can ask myself- what is it that I am really wanting now…ox
CMJ
Sadly, I did not get very positive messages about food growing up.
I was taught not to trust my body or my own cues, but rather to eat everything on my plate (that someone else made up for me) & to avoid foods that my parents didn’t like.
I remember feeling a strong pull toward vegetarianism from a very early age, but it was treated as a phase or an inconvenience. It took me years to gather up the courage & trust to make this change.
I also recently realized that so many events & social situations (which can create anxiety & a deeply uncomfortable feelings of obligation & perfectionism) revolve around food.
Now that I have 2 little ones of my own I am really working hard being an amazing role model for them. Changing my thought about food, how I eat & what I eat is a big part of this for me. Thank you for this post!